for the last III years

                     I haven’t seen

my dad

sends me portraits of his tulips.

                     he call them тюльпашки 

                             -    little tulips in russian

and              he has many kinds of them     in his dacha garden.

I have collected his photos in a positive-negative-positive collage

reflecting on the questions of
                                               personal memory and collective history, 

                                            of 

                                               be_longing and home, where 

the only emotional shelter 

                                                                    left for me in the present 

is                                                                              

                          nostalgia.